Dear Dirty America

For those of you who have been following Dear Dirty America during its last (almost) year and a half, you’ve probably run into one or more of those strange stories from the “Newswire”. You might have recognized that those particular stories were not perfectly true, that some of them bent the truth, and many of them were simply outlandish.

Oftentimes their themes were accurate, but their details were completely false.

Some readers were angry when they realized that after Hillary Clinton’s apology to Pakistan, 24 soldiers accidentally slain by the US were not actually resurrected. While other readers clambered aboard the “shit your underwear and send them to the White House” campaign. Press Secretary Jay Carney is still holding his nose and he refuses to open any more packages addressed to him or the president. They now have refugees from Afghanistan opening all the president’s mail. Safety measures in these uncertain times can never be stringent enough.

Well, I’ve long been a fan of the fake news story. They can be funny, inspiring, maddening, or even enlightening. But now, all these months later, I’ve decided to scrub them from this site. The Newswire has broken. It’s gone up in a puff of smoke. Sparks flew. Hisses and whirring sounds pealed out the back. The power box erupted in flames. The entire machine popped and crackled in the heat. All of the Newswire’s vulnerable, softer insides melted into an awful puddle that blew a stench as wicked as a tire fire in an untimely wind.

There will remain on this site the Dear Dirty Newswire archives. For better or worse.

I will not start a separate fake news site. That would be banal and unneeded in this society. We’ve got the Onion, for Christ’s sake. Do we need another? What would I call it? The Pear? Or, Pearody? No, dear reader, enough is enough!

Dear Dirty America has acquired into its ranks a cabinet of highly skilled and talented writers. Creators of fiction. Poetry. Political analysis. Cultural critiques. Satire. These are the workings of vast thinkers and intellectuals possessed by abounding exuberance and spirit. I’ve been blessed to be surrounded by writers more advanced in their craft than myself.

Thank you for sharing the stories on social media sites, and for the support.

NEWSWIRE ARCHIVES