Dear Dirty America

L.A. / Society

23 BULLS Tearing Up the 210 Freeway

    23 BULLS Tearing Up the 210 Freeway

ADAM MICHAEL LUEBKE pressing on In California, like everywhere else, most of the cars with you on the freeway are driven by unimportant humans, like myself and yourself, but the

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VISA Black Card Offer: From Pauper to VIP

    VISA Black Card Offer: From Pauper to VIP

ADAM MICHAEL LUEBKE qualified human I’ve lived the life of a pauper for a reason. I like it. Well, most days I like it. And the alternative is worse. The

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You’re the Reason It Doesn’t Rain In California

    You’re the Reason It Doesn’t Rain In California

It rained for two and a half days. Gentle, pitter-pattering that we all should have been hoping and praying for. No mudslides, but a much needed dousing. Yet my neighbor,

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Relishing the Sony Hacking Scandal; North Korea ‘Routing the Hollywood Zionists’

    Relishing the Sony Hacking Scandal; North Korea ‘Routing the Hollywood Zionists’

My North Korean readership has been warning me to get out of the United States before I’m deemed an enemy. “Come to Promised Land,” one man wrote me. He claims

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Holiday Kindness: Am I Worth the Genetically-Modified Calories I Take In?

    Holiday Kindness: Am I Worth the Genetically-Modified Calories I Take In?

ADAM MICHAEL LUEBKE I really thought the day before Thanksgiving I was going to witness my first headline-worthy act of

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Unless You’re the LA Mayor, It’s Essential You Cut Back on Water

    Unless You’re the LA Mayor, It’s Essential You Cut Back on Water

September 23, 2013 The Los Angeles Energy Savings Assistance Program Boondoggle Bob was beside himself. Actually, I was beside Bob,

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Getting Married to a Star: What Worries You About Charlie Manson?

    Getting Married to a Star: What Worries You About Charlie Manson?

I received a highly confidential, insider’s report that the leader of the Hermit Kingdom, Kim Jong-Un, reportedly clapped his hands

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Like Ants to Costco Toiling After the Metaphorical Pinch of Sugar

    Like Ants to Costco Toiling After the Metaphorical Pinch of Sugar

ADAM MICHAEL LUEBKE for Kim Jong Un, who gave us quite a scare Before leaving home I noticed a string

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Ebola Like An Oil Change, Says Lyle Shove-It, Hollywood’s Famous Bum & Oracle

    Ebola Like An Oil Change, Says Lyle Shove-It, Hollywood’s Famous Bum & Oracle

ADAM MICHAEL LUEBKE somewhere in LA I wrote four years ago that 2010 would be the best year to die,

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Rivers Flows Back Into the Ocean

    Rivers Flows Back Into the Ocean

The man whom everybody suspected was mentally retarded said rather fluently about Joan Rivers’ death, “I hope they really tighten the lid good.” Most of the old men sitting around

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