Dear Dirty America

One degenerative hack writes:

There was an awful lot of Liberty walking around yesterday. I’m not sure where it went today, but I know it will turn up again. I hope we don’t have to wait for the next nine-eleven to find it.

In fact, I cannot wait for those 364 days to pass so I can again take part in such fulfilling, heartfelt celebrations of September 11, 2001. Everybody was outside roasting weenies and slapping each other on their backs. “Well, how about them terrorists, old boy! We licked those bastards!”