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Iraq PM Says Country Easier to Manage with 4 Million Less People

February 08
12:30 2012
Dear Dirty Newswire

BAGHDAD–Iraq’s Prime Minister Nouri Al-Maliki told reporters he wanted to thank America for making the controlling of his country that much easier now that it only has 22 million inhabitants instead of 26. Since the U.S.-led invasion, almost 1.5 million Iraqis were killed, and over 2.4 million fled into Egypt and Jordan to escape the violence.

“As everybody knows, Iraq is difficult to handle, but without four million of our more boisterous civilians, I now have a better handle on the situation of rebuilding and restructuring this nation. Let’s imagine those four million were still in our country today,” he said, and then tapped his toes four million times before saying, “the situation would be that much stickier.”

The US Department of Defense did not release a response to Al-Maliki’s statement, but it is assumed they understand the sentiment.

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